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Let’s face it – being the healthy parent when your spouse has a chronic illness is tough. You’re juggling a lot, and it’s easy to worry that your kids might get lost in the shuffle. I get it, and that’s why I’ve put together these resources.
To help you navigate these tricky waters, I’ve compiled a list of activities designed to get your kids talking about their feelings and experiences. These aren’t just any activities – they’re specially chosen to open up conversations about living with a parent who has a chronic illness. Whether it’s through art, writing, or play, these activities can help your children express themselves in ways they might find difficult with words alone.
I’ve also curated a book list that tackles this topic head-on. Books can be powerful tools for kids to see their experiences reflected and to gain new perspectives. From picture books for the little ones to novels for teens, there’s something here for every age group.
But here’s the best part – this resource list is a living, breathing thing. I’m constantly on the lookout for new resources, activities, and books to add. So make sure to bookmark this page and check back regularly. You never know what new gem you might find that could make a big difference for your family.
Remember, you’re doing great in a challenging situation. I hope these resources can make your journey a little easier, one activity or book at a time.
Book Recommendations
These books help children understand and process a parent’s chronic illness. They offer:
- Age-appropriate explanations
- Relatable characters
- Ways to explore complex emotions
Reading together can open conversations and provide comfort, fostering resilience and empathy in your child.
Ravyn’s Doll: How to Explain Fibromyalgia to Your Child
Written by Melissa Swanson / Illustrated by Ana Aleksanyan
From Amazon: “Ravyn’s Doll is a simple and effective way to explain fibromyalgia to your child. In a way that is understandable to children. it shows that not all illnesses are visible and explains how living with an invisible illness affects families’ daily lives. Ravyn’s Doll describes and illustrates why mom or dad can’t do the things they used to do — things that other moms, dads or other family members can do.”
When Pete’s Dad Got Sick: A Book About Chronic Illness (Helping Kids Heal)
Written by Kathleen Long Bostrom / Illustrated by Cheri Bladholm
Ages: 4-8
From Amazon: “A story to help children understand and accept a chronically ill parent—for ages 4-8”. Disclaimer: some reviews caution that that book relies heavily on the family having a Christian faith.
Written by Melinda Malott
Ages: 8-12
From Amazon: “This is the book we’ve been waiting for-a story for children of parents with Fibromyalgia or Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. In fact, I plan to buy a copy for all my loved ones, so they’ll better understand what my life is like. It all depends on how many marbles are in my jar each day-the perfect metaphor for explaining the unpredictability and the ups and downs of Fibromyalgia and CFS.”
Written by Annette Rivlin-Gutman / Illustrated by Bonnie Lemaire and Shannon Stamey
Ages: 5-6
From Amazon: “Mommy Has to Stay in Bed is for young children who are faced with the trauma of having a parent on bed rest. In this rhythmic and sensitive story, mother and daughter find ways to cope with feelings of frustration and boredom. Whether the parent is pregnant, has the flu, or is on long-term bed rest, Mommy Has to Stay in Bed brings the brighter side of spending time together in spite of a challenging situation.”
Written by Josie Leon / Illustrated by Elizabeth Parkes
Ages: 2-5
From Amazon: When Mommy is having health issues, finding a way to discuss it with a toddler can be challenging. Mommy’s Going to the Hospital offers parents a way to start a discussion using clear language and illustrations that can help you and your family make a plan for the situations and emotions that may arise as Mommy journeys from diagnosis, through the healing process, and back to full health.
Written and Illustrated by Jayne Ann Osborne
From Amazon: “When mommies get sick, and sometimes they do, how do things change for me and for you?
Whether it’s a 24 hour bug, a months long struggle, or a chronic condition, everyone gets sick… including mothers. “When Mommies Get Sick” helps empower young readers by illustrating what to expect and how to help when their mother experiences illness or injury. This book serves as a fun, yet practical resource for the entire family, bringing them closer together during the storms and trials of life.”
My Mom is Sick and It’s Okay: Chronic Illness
Written by Angie McPherson/Illustrated by Asiri Kulathunga
Ages: 8-12
From Amazon: “Morgan’s mom is sick. Sometimes she worries about her mom’s illness. But she’s found out over time, it might not be as scary as she thought. Join Morgan as she talks about what her family life is like living with a chronically ill parent. There is a resource guide at the back of the book if more information is needed.”
Written by Ferne Sherkin-Langer / Illustrated by Kay Life
Ages: 4 and up
From Mamasfacingforward.com: “In this beautiful watercolor illustrated children’s book, a little girl is experiencing a multitude of feelings when her mother is frequently hospitalized due to her chronic illness. Her father helps his daughter by counting down the days until her mother returns and comforting her through her sadness. While the specific illness is not listed, the feelings children experience during these stays are addressed with compassion and gentleness. As with Mommy’s Going to the Hospital, this is a perfect read for those that are frequently hospitalized.”
Worried (Dealing with Feeling…)
Written by Isabel Thomas / Illustrated by Clare Elsom
Ages: 5-6
From Amazon: “This book, part of the Dealing with Feeling series, looks at worry. Topics covered within the book include what it feels like to be worried, how to stop feeling worried, and how to help other people who might be feeling worried.”
Written by Tom Percival
Ages: 2-6
From Amazon: “Ruby loves being Ruby. Until, one day, she finds a worry. At first it’s not such a big worry, and that’s all right, but then it starts to grow. It gets bigger and bigger every day and it makes Ruby sad. How can Ruby get rid of it and feel like herself again A perceptive and poignant story that is a must-have for all children’s bookshelves. From Tom Percival’s bestselling Big Bright Feelings series, this is the perfect book for discussing childhood worries and anxieties, no matter how big or small they may be.”
When Someone Has a Very Serious Illness: Children Can Learn to Cope with Loss and Change
Written by Marge Heegaard/Illustrated by children
From Centering.org: “This book will help families communicate and evaluate a child’s understanding and feelings about family change while teaching basic concepts of illness and healthy coping skills.”
How to Help Children Through a Parent’s Serious Illness
Written by Kathleen McCue, MA, CCLS
From Dartmouth Children’s Health: “This book can help you help your child cope when a parent is diagnosed with a life threatening or chronic illness.”
Some Days: A Tale of Love, Ice Cream, and My Mom’s Chronic Illness
Written by Julia A. Stamm/Illustrated by Chamisa Kellogg
From Amazon: “Warm and uplifting, Some Days is the perfect story to share with your child about life with multiple sclerosis―or any chronic illness. Although some days are fast and some are slow, Rosie and Wyatt fill each one with love, excitement, and fun . . . not to mention ice cream!”
Activities to Get Kids Talking
Feelings Chart
Word Search: Chronic Illness
Ages: approximately 6-11
Worksheet: Complete the Sentence: When My Parent Doesn’t Feel Well Edition
Includes instructions for parents on Page 2
Ages: approximately 8-14
What to Say When Friends Ask
Ages: approximately 9-14
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